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Overall Rating : 4.5/10
Directed By : The Polonia Brothers
Erin Brown (Masters of Horror : Sick Girl (TV) )
Erika Smith (Sinful)
Brice Kennedy (Peter Rottentail)
Dave Fife (Razorteeth)
Supplied By : Camp Motion Pictures
Film Reviewed By : Rick L. Blalock
Date Reviewed : October. 17, 2007
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| PLOT Something ancient lurks in the surf off Sea Bright Beach. It swims silently, walks upright and breathes air. It's also very, very hungry…and not for seafood anymore. Tonya, Rodney and Rupert are out-of-towners joining a crowd of young people gathered on the beach for an all-weekend music festival. Even after several townspeople are torn apart and devoured by the humanoid creatures, the partygoers remain oblivious to the horror that has risen up from the sea. They dismiss local girl Tess as a weirdo and refuse to heed her cries and warnings that monsters roam the beach, hunting for human flesh…and that hundreds of buried egg sacks are ready to hatch at any moment. |
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| THE REVIEW The story of SPLATTER BEACH, begins as a group of 3 friends head down to the beach to party and have sex - well at least as far as Rodney and Girlfriend Tonya are concerned. Their friend Rupert, is a loner, whom happens to be a Journalism major in college, is more interest in investigating the mystery that surrounds the beach. Nicknamed "Splatter Beach", it is rumored that fish-like creatures lurk within the water, only to come ashore to feed on the humans whom visit the beach. When they arrive, it seems that indeed people are turning up missing So when Rodney and Tonya are added to the growing list, Rupert bands together with the local beach stud, and a woman everyone thought to be delusional, until now - Tess. Since the commencement of CAMP MOTION PICTURES, they have released some great do-it-yourself film, which most, were previously unreleased on DVD. With the release of SPLATTER BEACH, it marks their first "in-house"(self-produced production. Helming the project are twin brother, Writer/Director team, Mark and John Polonia. Earlier this year CAMP released a film that the Polonias made some 20 years ago out of High School called SPLATTER FARM, so here 20 years later, CAMP MOTION PICTURES team up with th duo to create a new film that, although not as gory, nor gritty, follows along the same lines. I guess it would be safe to say that, as far as the overall appearance goes, SPLATTER BEACH is the Polonia Brothers' best looking film to date. The story started out really fun and I enjoyed it, much like I enjoy other cheesy Slasher and monster flicks released in the 70s and 80s(although SPLATTER BEACH wasn't filmed in the 80s, it sure feels like it), but it wasn't long before that interest dwindled a little. You see, there are various scenes in which a beach band are playing - this is obviously an homage to all of the Frankie Avalon movies. Now this is fine, but in my opinion a band playing on the beach shouldn't'nt ever be in any Horror also it is blatantly obvious that both the band that's playing and the dancers have been green screened. Not only are they out of proportion on screen when it comes to what's in the action, but when one of the green screened folks cross paths with one of the real live actors - all static breaks loose so to speak. I'm sorry to say this, but this has to be some of the work green screen effects I have ever seen in a film( and i've seen a lot of these films), this film, cgi/green screen wise would be followed by the horribly bad SCARECROW SLAYER, in terms of botchery. With that said, yes I was enjoying the campy style of filmmaking, but for me, the green screened band and all, nearly ruined the film as a whole - it definitely did ruin the momentum it had going for it in the beginning. The acting was surprisingly not bad at all, with th exception of the cameo of co-Writer/Director John Polonia. While highly creative behind the camera, the Palonias(in my opinion) are just not cut out to be actors, which was a problem for SPLATTER FARM, luckily for this film, the appearance is brief. Brice Kennedy as Rodney portrays a role that has really become all to common in movies in general - the white guy that acts "black". There are a lot of these types of characters, especially in Horror films, and personally they annoy me me - but Kennedy plays the role comedically, which isn't so bad. Erin Brown( also known as Misty Mundae), has been going more mainstream as of late, straying away from the erotic roles she has become known for. Here she gets role that in some way brought remembrance to me of one of her earliest roles, it was a film called DUCK!: THE CARBINE HIGH MASSACRE, in both films she was a bit delusional in nature, but determined to prove a point. She really is a great actress, whom needs more exposure in film. Speaking of great actresses, the film also features SHOCK-O-RAMA regular Erika Smith. I personally love Erika and see her as very talented. She has the looks and ability, that would make her a great "poster girl" for just about any company, if they should choose to use her. I have to give mention of Ken Vansant, whom portrays Duke in the film, the guy whom spins his days pumping iron at the beach. Vansant, whom I am guessing is a good friend of the Polonia Brothers, appears to not be a regular working actor, as he doesn't have many roles in which he has appeared, but I must say, he does a fantastic job here. Duke is probably my favorite character overall, as the character offers up some of the most memorable lines and scenes. Overall, SPLATTER BEACH is a fun film, yet it doesn't have the gore a title like SPLATTER BEACH implies(SPLATTER FARM was actually gorier in my opinion), and had it possibly not had the green screen effects(which from what I am reading on other sites, hints that these scenes were put in to replace the original band that was cut - apparently this is revealed in the commentary track, in which I did not have time to view), which like I said, kind of ruined the momentum for me, I might have enjoyed it more. | ||||
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| GORE
METER 3.5/10 we get several maulings at the hands of the monster - perhaps the most memorable gore spot is a well executed beheading. |
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| MUSICAL
SCORE 4.5/10 The soundtrack is really bad, yet the tunes are kind of catchy in some weird way, making the soundtrack work surprisingly well (A second disc is included with the film that contains the full length soundtrack as a bonus). |
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| OVERALL
IMPRESSION OF THE FILM I have respect for the Polonias as they have been dedicated to their craft for years and continue to contribute to the art of filmmaking and do what they love. I expected to see improvement in overall production value, and I got just that with this film. but unfortunately there were other things that made it a rather uneven experience for me. |
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