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Overall Rating : 4/10
Directed By : Jeff Rector
Jeff Rector (Scarecrow Gone Wild)
Christa Campbell (2001 Maniacs)
Martin Kove (The Karate Kid)
Billy Drago (The Hills Have Eyes (2006) )
Supplied By : MTI Home Video
Film Reviewed By : Rick L. Blalock
Date Reviewed : January. 29, 2008
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| PLOT Successful businessman Richard Clarke is bitten by a beautiful vampire and is plunged into the dark world of the supernatural. Richard very quickly realizes that being undead isn't all that it's cracked up to be and must fight for survival, when a militaristic team of Vampire Hunters, the S.T.A.K.E. Team, discover his existence. Barely surviving, Richard's presence is brought to the attention of The BLEEDERS, a savage underground gang of Vampires bent on survival at all costs. All Hell breaks loose as it turns into a war for survival and no one is taking any prisoners. |
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| THE REVIEW In REVAMPED, Richard Clarke, a successful business man, on the day of his first anniversary has just found out that his wife has been cheating on him. Furious at the news, revenge is the first thing on his mind. And it's when he sees an infomercial for a cult called 'Kiss of Death Inc.", that offers to "turn" willing individuals, that he puts his plan into action. He plans to come back as a member of the living dead and get his revenge that way. When the beautiful Lilith shows up to turn him into what he desires, he has second thoughts - one reason is because he thinks of the disadvantages, the other is that he has fallen for Lilith, and wants to be certain that would come back so he could be with her "forever". Nonetheless he goes for it.....but it isn't until 5 years later that he is reanimated. But when he does come back, he finds that vampire life isn't so great...and he chooses to just stay to himself. That is until the vampire gang responsible for his turning find out he's alive and rejecting their ways. He is essentially rescued by Mary, a member of a "half breed"(half human, half vampire) called The Breeders. Together with The Breeders, Richard fights off the evil vampire clan, all while being torn between his survival and his love for Lilith, who is on the opposing side. When I first saw the cover art and read the tag line, "Immortality Sucks" for the film REVAMPED, I honestly thought I was in for just another Horror spoof. The truth is that, REVAMPED, IS a Horror spoof, it's not the greatest film of it's kind, nor is it the funniest, but it has enough to keep you're attention - like a bunch of unexpected cameos. In this comedic take on the whole vampire scenario, while most characters in such films embrace their transformation, Richard has second thoughts from the beginning. But despite his urge to turn away from his plans, he goes along with it anyway because he just can't resist the beautiful Lilith, the woman who turns him. He awakens to find that he doesn't like being a vampire at all, thus he finally decides to fight against the vamps along with a group of like minded half vampires. Think of the story as BLADE TRINITY, except throw out all of the seriousness and replace it with a whole lot of campy humor that sometimes hits the mark, while other times it does not. To ne honest the plot is ridiculous in every way, the dialogue seems to be inspired by a plethora of films that came before it, but it has something that not a lot of low budget flicks has, and that is a lot of random appearances by recognizable people. Like who expected to see Kato Kaelin as Richard's wife's new boyfriend, or better yet Dennis Haskins(Mr. Belding from SAVED BY THE BELL) as a satanist? There are actually quite a few more I could list, but it is kind of fun randomly spotting them as you watch. The plot for REVAMPED is really simple as the filmmakers have chosen not to go deep into the mythological aspect regarding vampire, we have two groups, the Vampires and the Breeders and they essentially battle for supremacy and that's about it, but it's really the "hit or miss humor that keeps the pace moving along. The star of the film, Jeff Rector almost does it all, from Directing, starring, writing and producing, he really has his plate full, as he multitasks on the various responsibilities - you really have to give anyone credit that even attempts such - especially in the realm of independent film, where a budget isn't always present. I'll admit that Horror spoofs aren't really my thing, but REVAMPED definitely has it's moments, despite what your initial reaction may be(at first I noticed a sort of "soap opera quality to it, but soon was able to forget). In the end, no REVAMPED won't be making any of my "favorite films" list, but it is a film that did keep my attention, and it did get a few laughs out of me. |
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| GORE
METER 3/10 A few bloody gunshots, and what every vampire movie has....bloody feedings. |
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| MUSICAL
SCORE 3.5/10 All I noticed was a few rock tracks in the background, but the film had a great opening theme composed by Midnight Syndicate. |
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| OVERALL
IMPRESSION OF THE FILM REVAMPED is obviously a budgeted effort, but with what he had, I think Jeff Rector did a good job of making the best of it. Some of the laughs are hit or miss....but the real treat is indeed the random sightings. This DVD will released on Febuary 19, 2008 |
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