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Overall Rating : 3/10
Directed By : Rick Fusselman
Josh Hudson
Rick Fusselman
Bernice Mullins
Supplied By : DSK Productions
Film Reviewed By : Rick Blalock
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| PLOT In the distant present of the year 2004, four disgruntled youths embark on a household of terror; screams; and a psycho killer (that can only be satisfied by a supersized happy meal).Who will survive Shit-tooth and his father, who longs for sexy parties? |
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| THE REVIEW RETARDS SHOULDN'T RUN WITH CHAINSAWS, despite the hilarious, the film has little to nothing hilarious about it to offer. The story is very much like the originally THE TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE, in which a mentally deranged, in this case mentally handicapped man goes on a killing rampage for no apparent reason at all. This plot has been done so many times over that it almost makes Michael Jackson's face look new.....and maybe it is just me here? Don't get me wrong here, I wouldn't have minded another TCM rehash if it would have succeeded in keeping me interested. The budget is never an issue with me, as I see all of this every day in many shapes, form's and sizes. But what IS a major issue with me is that of character development. In 'RETARDS' there are quite a few characters, but the problem is, we really nice get to find out who we are watching, who the are. I can't even begin to tell you who is whom in the picture as I really do not remember that being addressed. The gore in the film, well the blood was ok, by the literal "change in the couch cushion" budget they had but the guts looked like some stretched panty hose. I could think of numerous different alternative to use here, that would've fared better. The acting in the film, is terrible, but I expected that. All of it seemed improvised... it's really bad but spare a few lines from one of them, and I can't give you his name because I simply don't know who to address. But he wears a maroon and yellow jersey if that helps. Also the guy that play's the 'father", his put on impression is so annoying I just wanted him to shut the hell up. I will say that one of the stand-outs is the guy whom portrayed "Shit-Tooth" which was kind of funny when he cried about wanting a 'super-sized happy meal" and when his dad finally give it to him he say's the McDonald's catch-phrase, "I'm Lovin' It!" But, the best thing about RETARDS would have to be the appearance of Bernice Mullins' ass literally! |
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| GORE
METER 4/10 It is rather minimal is the gore department, some of it looks ok, while the rest is simply ridiculous. |
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| MUSICAL
SCORE 3/10 The soundtrack is so/so with one of the bands sounding a lot like The Kottonmouth Kings. |
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| OVERALL
IMPRESSION OF THE FILM My overall impression of RETARDS SHOULDN'T RUN WITH CHAINSAWS is this, the film could've been a lot better than it was, simply with some character development. Even with that I am not at all certain it would have been a good flick. But film shot on this kind of budget can succeed and I have seen it happen. My initial ranking was a 2.5/10 but seeing that there are TONS of potential in Rick Fusselman just waiting to breakout, I gave it a 3 instead. |
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