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Overall Rating : 4.5/10
Directed By : Fred Olen Ray
Christine Nguyen (Bikini Frankenstein)
Heather Vandeven (2007 Penthouse Pet of the Year)
Rebecca Love (Cleavagefield)
Supplied By : Infinity Entertainment Group/Retromedia Entertainment
Film Reviewed By : Rick L. Blalock
Date Reviewed : February. 23, 2010
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| PLOT Dr. Bikini Jones is on the hunt for the lost Temple of Eros. Using a golden idol as her guide, she searches the wild land of Moronica, along the way battling man-eating dinosaurs and fending off the sensuously wicked Evilla. | ||||
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| THE REVIEW In this spoof by Nicolas Medina(aka Fred Olen Ray), Bikini Jones is a world renowned archeologist, looking to score on her next mission. The mission has her in search of the fabled temple of Eros, in the land of Moronica. In the Temple of Eros, she hopes to find the legendary "Tiara of Aisha", because whoever possesses the artifact would be granted complete control over Moronica. To help aid her in her quest, she steals a sacred golden idol from the evil Emperoress, Evilla Cruella. But of course things don't come ease for Jones, because soon Evilla and her henchman, plot to retrieve the idol, because, after all, Evilla too has aspirations of claiming the tiara as well - but the plans that she has for it are a little different.....they are evil! Boy, over the last two months, Infinity Entertainment and Retromedia, sure have been busy - and it's good to see! BIKINI JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF EROS marks the 3rd release that I have reviewed for Retromedia(the other two being TWILIGHT VAMPS and BIKINI FRANKENSTEIN). Out of the three, TWILIGHT VAMPS was the most bland, but I did kind of enjoy BIKINI FRANKENSTEIN. The latest, BIKINI JONES, is really no different from any of the others, it has a story, but the story more or less just serves as a platform for many simulated sex scenes - but one think that sets BIKINI JONES apart from the previously mentioned is that the plot is, dare I say it, a little more developed. There is actually somewhat of a following plot here, as it's the old fashioned scenario of good(Jones) vs. bad(Evilla). Jones has a mission, that is simple, but the film throws in a few subtle turns to sort of derail her, which in turn makes for a better story, no matter how silly it may be. The one major hang-up that prevents it from being all out fun, is that it seems to take an eternity to get to the point of the story, as it tends to drag a little. Not even the sex scenes make it a smoother ride, but there are a couple of exceptions. The film has cameos by three adult industry stars in Brynn Tyler, Rebecca Love and 2006's Penthouse Pet of the Year, Heather Vandeven. Brynn Tyler is the first to show, with a great opening scene with Christine Nguyen, whom seduces her, Rebecca Love portrays and undercover spy for the evil Evilla, who shares a scene with both Nguyen and one of Jones' associates. Heather Vandeven has the most interesting/cool role as Evilla Cruella, Jones' arch nemesis. The Penthouse Pet has two sex scenes, a threesome with her henchman Drago and Bikini Jones, and the scene that is probably the best of the film, a solo between she and Frankie Cullen(Drago), the scene in which she is "rewarding" him for retrieving the golden idol from Jones. Once again, Ray doesn't fail when delivering the ladies, Brynn Tyler I have known about for sometime, and Heather Vandeven, who I ironically just had discovered days prior to receiving this film, is gorgeous. It's Rebecca Love with whom I wasn't familiar with, prior to this, despite her being coined a "fan favorite" of the box. But after seeing this, I can think of at least two reasons, I and many others will remember her. And of course we have Christine Nguyen as the titular character, Bikini Jones, there is also a sex scene involving Jayden Cole, who just starred in the last Retromedia release, that I wrote about, BIKINI FRANKENSTEIN. BIKINI JONES AND THE TEMPLE OF EROS, is yet another funny and silly spoof for this company, and like the others, and i'm sure, many others, it's not a good movie - but it's not bad in the fun department, if you have some time to waste! |
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| GORE
METER N/A |
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| MUSICAL
SCORE 2/10 Some adventure and jazz oriented tunes(I believe Ray recycles these, as I heard the same ones in the other films), and I believe some"techno rock". |
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| OVERALL
IMPRESSION OF THE FILM People that hate on these types of films are giving them way too much thought. Yes, they are bad, but the think is that the filmmakers know these and strive to make them so. They are, silly and over-the-top spoofs that are meant to be around for the sake of a fun time, and with a majority of them, I do enjoy them for just that. BIKINI JONES AND THE TEMPLE of EROS is another one that is good fun, but as I mention, it begins to sort of drag n the middle. All of these recent Retromedia releases have almost the same cast members, and these guys seem to be participating in them for just a good time and a laugh - Frankie Cullen seems to become for likable with each film that I see the guy in. This DVD will be released March 2, 2010 | ||||
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